I know I haven't posted in a few weeks - I've just been going through it lately. Jason got suspended a few weeks ago due to a mistake he made at work and he just got suspended yet again, but this time for something that wasn't his fault. October 6th was Jason's mom's six months that she's been passed away. I've been struggling a lot with getting my shit together, feeling like everything around me is just...artificial. Last Friday I was supposed to have a doctor's appointment with my primary care doctor and I forgot all about it due to it being Jay's mom's six month passing. I went and got the memorial tattoo for Jay's mother and it came out absolutely beautiful.
I've been thinking about a lot of different things lately like about our future, my health, my career, etc. After having missed my doctor's appointment last Friday, I made the decision to go back to therapy. I hadn't been since around April or May because of Jay's mom being so sick and being between jobs. I need to take some time to focus on myself. I'm trying to lose weight, take better care of myself and my house and overall, just want to work on getting my shit together in general. I want to take time to myself to heal from everything - my past and losing Jay's mom. I'm in the process of rolling over my retirement plans from my previous employers to my current one. My therapist thinks it would be a good idea for me to write my thoughts and feelings down, so I'm going to keep track of my thoughts, feelings and my therapy journey. She told me that all the things I'm feeling and going through with my grief is all normal. I felt that six months had been too long to be grieving but she assured me that it's actually not that long at all and that most people grieve on average from the day of passing, up to three years...at least the heaviest part of it.
I've kinda just been going through the motions and running on auto-pilot. I'm not really in the mood to discuss what I've been going through with my grief right now, but I would like to mention it at a later date. I mainly just wanted this post to be a short and sweet update.
