Life is a gift: We didn't ask to be here, but we are and what we choose to do with our time here is very important as it determines our final destination. We were all chosen to be here for a reason and we all serve a purpose greater than we know. God gave us all a life to see what we would do with it and with that life, we all have decisions to make. These decisions should be made with great discretion and wisdom. Mistakes will be made as we are human but it's how we learn from those mistakes that's important.
God is good and it's important to have a relationship with him: Though we may not always understand God's judgement, he is good. He has his reasons for the decision's he makes for the earth he has so graciously created - it's not for us to question even though we are curious by nature. He is the greatest teacher we have the privilege of having in our lives. He only allows those of us who accept him into our hearts to see the lessons he has for us. We are to serve our Lord Jesus Christ to the best of our ability and work toward a life of absolution. You should be pure with your intentions to accept God into your life and heart; God knows whose intentions are pure and whose are not. It's ill-advised to attempt an artificial relationship with God in attempt to go to heaven or because you want something from him. His purpose to us and our purpose to him is so much greater than we may ever come realize in our lifetime.
Learning is inevitable and is never-ending: I'm learning how short and precious life really is. It is after all a gift from God. As quickly as it was given to us, it can be just as quickly taken from us. We should be eternally grateful. I'm also learning patience, mindfulness, self-awareness, empathy, how to listen better, how to choose my words more wisely, admitting when I do wrong and making a conscious, genuine effort to improve, processing and reflection, what's truly important, how to love myself and others, how to pick and choose my battles, selflessness, how to improve my relationship with God and others, what I need to work on and how to work on it. All of it and the list goes on. You continue to learn for the rest of your life, learning never ends.
Family is important: It didn't necessarily take my mother-in-law to pass away to realize this, but it definitely magnified it for me. We may have issues with family from time to time and it's true that not all issues can be resolved. Sometimes it's even necessary to create distance in the absence of a resolution, but where there is opportunity to make things right, every attempt should be made. The family thing hasn't been an easy road for me due to how I was raised, it's something that I'm constantly trying to work on and improve. My mother-in-law taught me more about becoming family oriented than I've ever been taught from anyone in my entire life.
It's okay not to be okay: We often hide our feelings out of fear of being judged by others or enduring embarrassment. Truth is that most people experience not being okay at some point in their life, some more than others whether they show it or not. It's slowly but surely becoming more socially acceptable to not be okay. It's not okay to hold it all in and attempt to battle it by yourself - outcome is usually not a good one. If you don't have a good personal support system, you should seek help from a mental health professional. Having a healthy mental state is imperative to your well-being. I'm not underestimating how difficult it is to achieve, but starting somewhere is important. It's not easy, but it's worth it.
Healing is a process, be patient with yourself: Healing is a life-long journey. Everyone's journey is different because everyone has different experiences, some worse than others; but also, everyone's mind-set is not the same. It may be harder for one person to heal from something than another. It's not about keeping score here. Each person should understand two things about healing; there is not a right or wrong way to do it and you are on no one else's timeline but your own.
Being stagnant is okay, but not forever: There are days where we just can't, whatever that may be. Mental health can be exhausting and some days we just might not be able to push through with whatever it is that we have to do whether it be household chores, work, appointments, etc. It's okay to take a day or two to rest as needed, but you also have to be aware that you need to be able to get back on your feet and eventually face life again. If you feel yourself slowly slipping into a void of bad habits, seek professional help.
Helping others is important, but setting boundaries is okay: We should help others when we can. Helping others when we have the means to is imperative to being a good person. You should also do so and expect nothing in return. Not everyone has the same ability to help others as another person might. Helping others should be genuine and selfless. In saying this, you can't be there for everyone all the time and that's perfectly okay. It's okay to tell people no from time to time. Let's face it, we all need a little of our own TLC every now and then. Some people may get upset when you have to tell them, "No" - this is a normal human reaction. Understand that you are also under no obligation to explain yourself to other people as to why you have to say no. Others may not understand your reasoning anyway, but they are not living your life.
Self-care is important: Adequate hydration and sleep are important. A well-balanced diet is important. Exercise is important. Pain management is important. Working through mental health issues is important. Finding time to engage in things you enjoy is important. Cutting back and being abstinent from bad habits is important. Good hygiene is important. It's ALL important to get the best quality of life and highest life expectancy that you can out of your life!
Perspective is everything: It's not very often that we try to see things from a different perspective from our own. However, sometimes it's necessary in order to achieve a desired result or resolution to a problem. As it relates to being in a conflict, it's natural for us to automatically resort to a perspective that makes us the victim instead of the wrongdoer because who likes being told they were in the wrong? It's not a very good feeling to be told we were wrong. It takes a mature, strong individual to admit they were wrong. That's why talking to others and educating yourself is important. You don't always have to agree with others, but it helps you to gain an understanding of others and their mental capacity.
A few things to remember:
It's okay to eliminate things from your life that don't promote growth or bring you peace. It's 110% okay to create distance away from toxicity. You can only control the things you have control of and leave the rest to God. It's not worth it to break your own character because of other people's behavior - God will handle those individuals in due time, that's not for us to be concerned with. We can only be accountable for our own behaviors.
