You'd Never Believe Me If I Told You

 Happy Saturday, folks!

Work was pretty good this past week.  I decided to take a PTO day from work on Thursday and schedule me an emergency appointment to have my right big toenail removed because it just kept getting infected.  Friday's is OT for me so if I take a Thursday off, I also get Friday, Saturday and Sunday off.  I also took this Monday off just in case.  Seeing how I was getting a surgical procedure done, I wanted time to heal.  So, Thursday morning I took off to the podiatrist, thinking I was just going to get a toenail removed.  When the doctor came in to look at my feet, she told me that the infected toe had a tumor.  Excuse me - what?  Yes.  You read that right - a tumor.  I was just as shocked as you are reading this right now.  Apparently, you can get benign tumors in your body from trauma, and you can also get a tumor in your toe at that!

While I was there, we discussed the treatment plan for the other three toenails.  At first, I was convinced that I wanted them all removed, and chemical burned for permanent removal because I'm sick and tired of them growing back in wrong, getting infected and having to keep getting them removed.  She told me that I might want to explore other options first before doing a permanent removal because there is no going back after that.  With the way insurance works now, you can only get one toenail removed at a time.  Each toenail removal requires a 2-week post-op follow-up.  We discussed this new method of corrective putty that will hopefully train the toenail to grow in properly.  This takes place roughly four months after the toenails have been removed, so with that being said, I need to schedule these other three removals back-to-back.  The goal is to get one removed at each post-op follow-up appointment from the previous removal.  I e-mailed my boss and let him know about the plan and to see if it was something he could help me out with.  I'll be off work Monday as well so I will be speaking with my doctor's nurse at some point to go over the plan and see if it's something she'd be on board with.

I changed my bedding over and did tons of laundry.  We're just going to eat Salisbury steaks this week for dinner with roasted red potatoes, corn and coleslaw.  Isabelle hung out with me through all my household chores yesterday from changing the bedding to doing the laundry - she was mad when I took the socks away from her! LOL!  Then she wore herself out and found herself a nice comfy blanket on the bed to rest on.  I came back into the bedroom after starting the first load of laundry and found this:

Jay hates when I take pictures of him sleeping, but when he has all three of my fur babies with him, how can I not get them all in the same picture!  Jay went out to cut the grass while I was inside getting things done.  Once he got all showered up, we went and got Burger King then came home to eat dinner and watch Black Sheep with Chris Farley and David Spade.  The first soak I did on my toe yesterday absolutely sucked!  The gauze was stuck to my toe, and I had to basically pry it off.  I did so under the water I was soaking in, and it still hurt like a bitch.

I dozed off early last night then woke up and ate a pint of Ben and Jerry's at 3 a.m. because my throat was incredibly sore and also, why not?  That's one of the many perks of being an adult - you can do what you want, when you want.  Tomorrow I'm going to do another load of laundry and get a few other things done around the house.  I'm probably going to make us grilled cheese for lunch with some tomato soup then we are having fish sticks for dinner!  I haven't had them in long time, so I thought, "Why not?"  I'm also going to prepare our sides for our dinner for the week and get them all cooked up.  The Salisbury steak is just in a frozen pack that can be done up in the microwave, so I'm going to just pop them in fresh.  I know, I know - frozen meal but I'm just tired of actually cooking and just wanted a break from it.

I hope ya'll are having a wonderful weekend.

Common Misconceptions V.S Facts about Introverts (Introvert Series: Part 2)

Introverts Don't Like People - This is not at all true and is a very broad statement.  However, we do tend to avoid people who come baring negativity in any form, especially conflict or drama.  Overly socializing can cause us anxiety so imagine adding conflict or drama to that mix.  We don't mind people in general but prefer that if we are going to be around people, to refrain from large crowds.

Introverts Are Shy - I can definitely attest that this is 110% a myth.  And if you ARE shy, it's got nothing to do with being an introvert.  Being quiet for an introvert can mean a lot of things.  When I'm introduced to a new group of people (EX: Starting a new job), I'm quiet as to observe my environment and the people in it, being cautious.  Once I get a feel for the people that I'll be around, I will socialize but it's not due to being shy - it's a self-protection tactic.  We just don't like to be the center of attention and public speaking is definitely not our thing!

Introverts Are Unhappy and Unapproachable - This also is 110% a myth.  Whether someone is dealing with depression or has bouts of being unapproachable has nothing to do with being an introvert.  I have chronic mental health issues with anxiety, depression, stress and PTSD - not to mention all my physical ailments, so if I'm personally seemingly unhappy or unapproachable, it's usually due to my disorders flaring up, not the fact that I'm an introvert.

Introverts Never Like to Go Out - Again, not true.  I do prefer to mostly stay in as I'm a homebody, but I do also like going out from time to time.  I enjoy going on vacations and select events. 

Introverts are Difficult and Like to Argue - WRONG!  This is actually the exact opposite.  We don't like conflict and avoid it at all costs.  In fact, if we get the sense that YOU are the arguing type, we'll just let you go on thinking you're right even if you're wrong.

The thing about being an introvert is most people associate it with negative personality traits and can't decipher the difference between what is part of a general personality characteristic and what is part of a cause to a situation.  Usually, people are ignorant on the things they choose not to educate themselves about - that's a fact!

Now that we have covered some misconceptions, let's get into the actual facts of being an introvert versus an extrovert!  Knowledge is power!

Tips Tuesday: How to be Social in the Workplace When You're an Extreme Introvert (Introvert Series: Part 1)

If you're anything like me, you've done at least 90% or better of the above!  To say the least, I'd DEFINITELY win bingo if this was in fact a bingo game.  There are many reasons why someone could be an introvert - my reason why?  Trauma.  I've had a lot of extreme negative experiences with people that have led me to an introvert personality.  This is not to say that I don't like people or don't want to be around people.  I just prefer to spend the majority of my free time alone.  There are a lot of misconceptions about introverts and challenges that we face on a daily basis being an introvert.  This topic will most likely become a series because this is not talked about enough and needs awareness brought to it.

This post will give tips as to how to be more social in the workplace when you're an extreme introvert.  What prompted this particular topic is that I have recently found myself struggling with this.  I started a new job back in May of this year and it's very much a different work environment - a more positive, "happy" one.  Not only am I an introvert, but I also struggle with chronic anxiety and depression as well as PTSD.  Because of this, I tend to not come across to other people in the best manner all the time.  I've had a lot of false accusations made about me which made me feel bad about myself.  The truth is, there are SO many people in this world with all different levels of perception and sensitivity - it's nearly impossible to accommodate them all.  I'm not saying change yourself for anyone by any means when I give these tips, but merely advising you to practice mindfulness - there is a difference!

Tip #1: Facial Expressions - I have a resting bitch face practically all the time.  I deal with a lot of issues with my mental health and physical health on a daily basis.  A good majority of the time, if my facial expressions appear negative, it's either got to do with what I'm dealing with in my head, in my body or both.  The reason is very rarely anything other than that.  However, others don't always know what you're going through and could take your facial expressions personally.  Try to be mindful of your facial expressions when you are able to catch yourself and if you find yourself in a situation with another person where they make a comment, just briefly let them in on the know so no false accusations can be made.

Tip #2: Being Overly Quiet - When I'm dealing with something mentally or physically, I get more quiet than normal.  Sometimes I really just don't want to be bothered to be honest.  So that I contribute my part to a peaceful work environment, I make an effort to speak to others every so often.  I always make sure first that I genuinely want to speak to the person as not to be fake.  Often times people can take someone being overly quiet as anti-social or unapproachable.

Tip #3: You Have to Handle Everyone Differently - You have to watch what you say and who you say it to.  With certain people, you have to watch what you say and the tone you're saying it in.  Some people don't like talking about certain topics, prefer to not hear cuss words and some others take sensitivity to how you say something and in what tone you say it in.  I've been misunderstood a lot in my life and had to try to clarify what I actually meant to the person on the receiving end.  Incorrectly conveying messages is a fault of mine and is something that I continue to work on.

Tip #4: Be Responsive w/ Empathy When the Situation Calls for it - Sometimes interactions call for minimal talking and more listening.  There are times where people just need a listening ear.  If you've done something wrong in a situation, own it and apologize for it.  I like to follow up owning what I do wrong and apologizing with a, "I'm going to work on that".  It shows that you are going to hold yourself accountable for your actions and speaks volumes about your character.  It's not always an easy thing to do but it's very necessary.

Tip #5: Keep Your Mood in Check - Being an introvert, we tend to get overwhelmed excessively when we are in environments that require us to be social which can lead to anxiety.  When the combination takes place, sometimes we can become in a snippy mood - especially if you're someone like me who deals with a lot mentally and physically.  Sometimes I'm in so much pain physically that it's difficult for me to keep my mood in check.  Maybe try forewarning the person you have to have direct contact with if you can't guarantee your mood status that way it doesn't come as such a shock to them.

Tip #6: Take a Minute if you Need it - Like I said above, being an introvert can be overwhelming and can cause anxiety when we are forced to be in a social environment.  If you find yourself getting worked up, perhaps excuse yourself and go to the bathroom where you can take a breather for a minute.  It's perfectly acceptable to do.  When you have an opportunity to work by yourself throughout the workday, take that time to find your Zen so that you can keep yourself well balanced throughout your workday.

Tip #7: Attempt to Clarify Yourself - If you find yourself in an unsatisfactory situation with a co-worker, attempt to clarify yourself.  If you can't do so in the moment because either party is angered, try to reconvene at a later time.  We often, by human nature, tend to play the victim in a negative situation - but attempting to reflect on what you could have done wrong in the given situation is the mature thing to do.  Also letting the other person know how they made you feel is also acceptable.  You can only be responsible for your actions and yours alone.  If you attempt to clear things up with said person and they just won't have it, that's on them - not you.  If you come to that crossroad, you have to just move on - that's all you can do.  I've been in both types of situations - (A): Where I was able to communicate with the person I was having a conflict with and was able to resolve it mutually. (B): Where I attempted to communicate with the person I was having a conflict with and they just didn't want to hear it.  It is what it is.

Stay tuned on my next post on introverts and the many misconceptions we face on a daily basis!

8 Products that I Love and Use Regularly

 8 Products that I Love and Use Regularly

EOS Chapstick - keeps my lips hydrated and soft!

Coco Colada Whipped Shea Body Butter by Tree Hut - I use this stuff everywhere - on my tattoos to my face!  Smells great!  It's a wonderful moisturizer.

Dove Body Wash - multiple scents but I do favor the shea butter ones as they leave my skin moisturized and soft.

Velvet Coffee Sugar Scrub by Tree Hut - Literally smells like freshly brewed coffee.  The sugar granules are small for a mess free exfoliation.

OGX Coconut Miracle Oil Shampoo and Conditioner - This stuff is great!  Enough said!

CeraVe Hydrating Facial Cleanser - I have a lot of issues with my skin and this stuff is the best I've found to keep my skin issues at bay!

Bath and Bodyworks Coco Paradise Body Spray and Body Cream - But really anything that smells nice from them!  Their scents are long lasting and light!  Do you see a trend?  I love ALL things coconut!!

Flamingo Body Wax Strips - This is a new product I tried this past month because I'm finally getting tired of shaving and want the hair to stay gone longer - Jay waxed my legs for me as I've been having problems with my back, so bending down has been a challenge!  Isn't he SO sweet for doing that for me?  I don't know ANY man that would do that for their partner!  So far, they work well!  $10 for a pack of 28 strips!  I just NOW have hair growing back after about three weeks!

Weekend Wind-Down: Weekends Don't Last Long Enough

I had a three-day weekend as I'm on a rotation every other Friday for overtime.  It sure was nice but makes me dread the weeks where I have to work Friday's.  I slept a lot on Friday - I've been just completely exhausted and really not feeling too well lately.  I also worked on some phone cases for myself.  I'm trying my hand at the decoden again to see if I can get it right.  I will be testing durability over the next few weeks with the cases that I made for myself.  But I mostly just got rest and did household chores this weekend.  I made a pizza pasta casserole that came out absolutely delicious!  I'm definitely making it again.

Last week my co-worker invited me to join her Facebook live for a company's jewelry she sells called Paparazzi.  I wasn't really interested at first, but I got sucked in!  I'm going to be purchasing more jewelry from her in the near future.  I purchased a whole set the second time I watched her live.

I absolutely LOVE that stars and moon collection, especially the earrings!  But anyway, Saturday babe cut the grass and then later on we got Burger King for dinner.  The Burger King that we normally go to was only accepting cash, so we went to the other one in town and their food sucked!  The fries were okay, but my chicken sandwich was definitely cooked with old oil - gross!  Other than that, I just played a lot of Farmville 2 and relaxed.  Jay and I watched Napoleon Dynamite while we ate dinner.  I've been dealing with a cyst that has been growing near my private area - I've been treating it with soaks and warm compresses, and it has gone down a little.  It's not so sore anymore.

Cali let me cut her nails today even though she bit me once - which was okay because it wasn't a true bite, more like a warning nip, but she did really good for the most part.  I worked on my blog some today, like the actual layout formatting.  I'm so rusty with HTML but I figured it out - ya know, just trying to get things where I want them or don't want them.  My goal is to make this blog like my own little home on the internet, a place I can be comfy, that I can call mine.  That was pretty much my weekend in a nutshell.

10 Things Thursday: What I'm Looking Forward to from Now until the End of Next Year

Progressing in my healing journey - like I've mentioned several times, it's been a tough road for me this past year.  I've watched my mother-in-law go from being in a coma (fully intubated), to coming out of it and seeming like she was making progress, to her back sliding in her progress and then coming home and passing away about a week later.  It hasn't been easy - it put a whole entire stop on our lives and turned them completely upside down.  She was a great mother and my best-friend who I could tell just about anything to.  No matter where I'm at in my healing journey, my heart will always be heavy having lost her and there isn't a single day that will go by where I won't miss her.

Working on my happiness and inner peace - I'm working on this little by little, day by day.  It's definitely difficult when you've had so many life experiences that have shown you how ugly the world and the people in it can truly be.  I'm not saying the whole world and everyone in it is ugly - I'm just saying that I've had some experiences that have caused my significant trauma to where I'm more cautious than the average person.  Yes, I know - I'm not the only one who has gone through some shit but damn, am I allowed to just speak for myself here?  We all process things differently - some things are harder for others to go through.

Working on my general health - This one continues to be a challenge.  I have a lot of issues with anxiety, depression and stress as far as my mental health goes.  I also suffer from PTSD and have panic attack disorder.  This all leads to me having issues with binge eating as a crutch to get through it all.  I'd like to take time to work on both my mental and physical health.  I'm not quite sure how to go about it.  I'm very overwhelmed when it comes to this because I have extreme restrictions due to medical issues on what I can and can't do.

Making my home more "homier" - I've been thinking a lot about this one.  There are quite a few things I'd like to do in our house.  We've talked about re-doing in the floors, resurfacing the fireplace, painting, re-doing counter-tops, sinks, showers, buying new furniture, etc.  It's all very exciting and I think after almost 8 years of living in this house, we deserve to make it our own.

Taking a very much needed vacation - We weren't able to take a vacation this year due to Jay's mom passing away - we had to attend her funeral instead.  I started a new job as soon as I returned back to town without much time to grieve, let alone relax.  Jay and I like the beach, so more than likely, we will be going to the beach next year.

Saving money better - I'm getting better at this, but I'd like to save more money if possible.  I'm working on paying down my credit cards.  We have a lot of things we'd like to do in our home which takes a lot of money, but I know it will be worth it!

Starting my resin art business - I tried to do a custom decoden art phone case business last year and it didn't quite work out for me, so I've been researching what I might like to try next.  Note to self: Start small incase it doesn't work out!  I want to make custom charchuterie boards, shot glass holder paddles, coasters and their respective holders, accessories to go with the charchuterie boards, wine glass stoppers, cutting boards, etc...I love art and I love creating things!

Hopefully getting married (finally) - Everyone knows I already call Jay my husband because we have been together going on 13 years.  We aren't legally married, however.  We are hoping to change that within the next year or so!

Quitting vaping - This has also been a struggle because I use it as a coping mechanism for my stress.  I'm hoping to quit soon in hopes of bettering my health and my habits!

Getting out more - This is hard coming from someone who is an introvert.  I prefer to stay in as I'm a home body, but I also like going out from time to time.  It's also hard having chronic anxiety and depression.

There are many more things I'd like to work on - this is definitely not an exhaustive list.  This is merely just a basic self-guide reference of things I'd like to work on over the next year.

Mid-Week Catch-up: It's Been a Crazy Week Ya'll!

 Phew!

When I tell ya'll it's been a crazy week - It's been a CRAZY week!  It messed up all the plans I had to blog, so I apologize that I'm just now getting the opportunity to post!  Monday, we got a bad storm here in South Carolina where I live - trees were down everywhere and our power went out right after I warmed up my dinner.  I had to take a slight detour going home as there was a two-ton tree down in the middle of one of the roads that I take to get home from work.  Our power came back on about 12:30 p.m. on Tuesday.  When I was leaving work Tuesday afternoon, they had the main road closed down due to a tree down on some power lines.  What is usually a 15-minute drive home, took me a little over an hour - traffic was bumper to bumper.  So, to say the least, I've had an aggravating beginning to my week.  Supposedly we are supposed to be getting more storm like weather tomorrow that's going to be like Monday's storm and I'm dreading it because the storm we had on Monday looked like a tornado ripped through our town!

But work has been going much better for me.  I've been practicing being mindful all week and it's really paid off.  I realized that I don't have to be so angry and bitter all the time.  Life's been really tough for me lately having lost my mother-in-law back in April and I've been walking around with this really heavy chip on my shoulder because of it.  I don't want to be an ugly person and I'm still struggling to get through it.  I'm just taking it day by day.  Yesterday our crew-coordinator put me working with this wonderful woman named Casey and I've really been enjoying working with her - we've been having some really nice conversations at work.  I could definitely see myself being friends with her!  

We had a really good meal today at work!  And tomorrow we are getting an hour lunch because they are going to have two food trucks on site, and we get to tour the brand-new building they built next door which is super cool - that's where our suture department is going to be.

This past weekend, Jay and I binged on Taco Bell and Ben and Jerry's ice cream.  I also made home-made beef stroganoff.  I had to work over-time this past Friday, but we got off a little early which was nice.  I have this Friday off, so happy three-day weekend to me!  Yay!  Oh - and I purchased tickets for Jay, Jay's dad and I to go watch the Tour of Destruction on October 28th.  I'm excited!!

I love comfy weekends in the house!

This was just too cute - my whole entire world in one picture! 😊

My mom also went to my grandfather's and mother-in-law's grave this past weekend.  She put flowers on both of them from me since I can't be there.  Look how pretty my mother-in-law's grave is right now!

My mom did a wonderful job! 💗

I haven't been feeling the best this past week as I've been dealing with migraines but I'm getting through it.  I've been in a lot of pain lately and very tired.  But other than that, I've been having a great week other than the few inconveniences that frustrated me on my way home from work.  One more workday to get through before my much-needed three-day weekend!!